Journeyof1818: Bittersweet

Is this real life? Yes, yes it is. After many, many months of anticipation I will be leaving tomorrow for Haiti and Monday afternoon I will get to hold my daughter and let her know she is mine and that she has a forever family that loves her. This trip will be SO different than the first one in so many ways. Everyone will know she is mine. She will sleep away from her friends for the first time since she was an infant. A white woman will be caring for her and speaking only English and giving her love and attention she has never received before. She will get a bath and have her hair washed and combed and fixed and she will have new clothes and soft diapers that will be changed many times a day and she will have shoes and blankets and toys and so much more. She is also going be leaving the only home she has ever known, the sights, sounds, smells and tastes that are familiar, the language, songs, care and love of nannies, the birth mom that was too young to keep her and be able to feed her, the country of her origin, her life as she knows it. This trip is bittersweet. I know how the end of the story goes but this little two year old has no idea. Trying to put myself in her place and the overwhelming feelings she must harbor inside. Fervently praying for her as I prepare to travel as well as my little ones at home – they have no idea what lies ahead.

I had to be at the airport at 3:30am to leave for Haiti. There was a mission team from Ohio that I got to spend my morning with and I just fell in love with them and their heart for the people of Haiti. I arrived in Haiti (not getting sick on the plane) and was greeted at the airport by the co-founder of Second Mile Ministries, Jenn Schenk! http://secondmilehaiti.com First stop – Haitian bakery (Jen was craving a donut). Next stop – VERY unexpected – was on a random road on the way to Second Mile. Yep our entire truck was stuck in the mud. What an awesome experience to watch many villagers come to our aid and to see people actually being the hands and feet of Jesus! Then we arrived a Second Mile and I got a tour of the property and an update of their progress. These girls may be young but they TOTALLY get it! They will forever have my support (and hopefully yours too).

Now we enter the gates of COTP http://childrenofthepromise.org and my heart skips a beat. I am about to pick up my daughter FOREVER! After placing my luggage in my room and pulling my hair back I went to the playground to see my sweet Esther! She came right to me (unlike I expected) and she clung to me for the rest of the day! We spent time playing with her friends and bonding with each other. I fed her lunch and she went down for a nap with her friends then I came back after nap to get her. As soon as she saw me through the window she crawled quickly to the door (and maybe pushed her friends out of the way). We played together for the rest of the day and she went to bed with her friends (she wasn’t too thrilled about that).

Hook 'em Horns

Silly time with mommy

First Bath

Kindermusik time

That evening I got to spend time with THE most amazing group of volunteers ever. God totally knew I needed this group from Orange City, IA http://www.frcoc.org to help me through this transition. Iowa has never been on my top 10 list of places to vacation but they might have changed my mind! They are just THAT worth it! These people cooked meals for me(gluten free), helped me with Esther, included me in everything they did, took care of my luggage, let me ride in the front of the truck, waited for me in immigration and celebrated our arrival to the states! I will never be able to thank them enough for their generosity and their Christ-like spirit!

The day came that I looked most forward to and dreaded the most at the same time. I had the opportunity to meet Esther's birth mother. What a blessing this was because I know that this is not typical in an International adoption. She is still a teenager and very sweet. Her story is heartbreaking and she loves her daughter. We took pictures together and she even let me shoot a video of her holding Esther and talking to her that I will share with Esther in the future. My prayer for this sweet girl is that she finds Jesus along her journey and that one day we will reconnect.

Our last day we got to have a good-bye party for Esther with ALL of her friends and nannies and COTP staff. It was very emotional for me just thinking through all of the children there and what their lives are like and how they will change and what the nannies must feel as the children they care for for years just get swept away by families they have never met. One of the nannies prayed over Esther and although I didn't understand much of what she said I could tell she was filled with the spirit and was interceding on Esther's behalf. This was such a blessing to be a part of. We got to eat cookies made by the awesome Emily Moxon and play with all of Esther's friends. Such a great way to end this chapter of her life!

Esther and her Friends

Emily Moxon Cookies

Prayer over Esther

Nanny love

Leaving Haiti

Back home!

Ft. Lauderdale

Thursday was my birthday and that was the day Esther came with me to the States – BEST birthday present ever! We were met by a group of sweet friends in Ft. Lauderdale along with my parents. What a fun surprise for me! That was followed by a night at my parents with my favorite cake and dinner and some bonding time with Esther and her MiMi and DD!

Sweet moment with precious friend Mikel Venus

Welcome to the USA!

Gift from the Venus Family

Happy Birthday Mommy!

Bye Bye MiMi and DD

Friday we went to lunch and then we went to the airport early to see if we could catch an earlier flight. The flights were full so we had to wait a few hours for our scheduled flight. In the mean time Esther and I got to meet two amazing couples and share our story of adoption. One of the women was in the middle of Beth Moore’s study of Esther and so we both sat in tears as we shared stories with each other about that study and about our own journey with Esther!

Time to board the plane and get ready to introduce Esther to the rest of her family. She was amazing on the flight (I know the guy next to me was worried). Once we arrived we found out our gate had changed so our airport party people had to rush to move to the right gate! What a blessing to get off the plane and find a crew of friends and family there to welcome Esther to Texas! Such an overwhelming feeling that I will never be able to describe. Esther is officially a Texan! We are home!